Emptiness~

Silence builds an awful wreckage of a girl
It feeds on loneliness and creates a void
Gray shadows haunt and torment and torture
A teenager is stricken and destroyed.


There is no sound of laughter or happiness here
The little one has thrown in the towel today
Somber, melancholy moods decay the soul
It is futile to hope and dream and pray.


Emptiness builds a home in this girl
In this heart, this soul where hollows have bred
A deepening sea of nowhereness consumes
And eats away at every connecting thread.


Confusion feeds like a savage inside her,
Leaving nothing considered worthy remains
Destined to walk through life less ordinary
Alone, exiled, different and disdained.

Incomplete...

Hmmm.. Tahun ni lg skali beraye tnpa ahli keluarga yg lengkap.. Da 2 kali raye aidilfitri my beloved sis, Along xdpt join.. Sume sbb dye tgh stdy kt India skrg ni.. Bygkn la 2 kali dye kne puase sorg2 tnpa fmly.. Fuhh.. Menguji keimanan btul.. 1st time beraye tanpa dye mmg sdey gle la ktorg.. Tp nk wt cmane, dye nk sgt ambik medic kn.. 2nd time raye tanpa dye ktorg da ble accept la, tp pg2 raye 2 mst cal dye dlu.. Biase la, drama air mata pn bmula la nnt di pg Syawal 2.. ;p

Now, lets move on to raye aidiladha plak.. Yg ni lg sdey sbb da 2 kali jgk ktorg beraye tanpa my beloved daddy, Abah n Along.. Tgl la kami berlima je..Owh lupe plak nk ckp, Abah kne transfer ke KL dr 2003 smpai la 2008.. Then kne transfer ke Sabah plak 2008 tu smpai la skrg sbb dpt nek pangkat lpas lulus exam pe ntah.. PTK or sumtin like dat la, xsure sgt.. Huhu..  Hurmm.. Bile la fmly ktorg akn lgkap blk.. Lambatnye nk tgu Abah kne transfer ke Kuantan blk or at least ke KL pn da kire ok la, xde la jauh sgt cm Sabah 2 kn..

Esok nk raye kn tp ktorg x rase cm raye pn sbb rmai yg xde.. Abah xde, Along xde.. Wan, nenek belah Mak pn da ikt Acik Suzi (makcik muda ;p) pindah Seremban.. Rndunye kt ank dye, Zakuan!! Nnt Omey (Qilah), ank Acik (makcik lg 1) pn nk g beraye kt Seremban.. Abah xbg Mak drive ke sane sbb Mak x biase drive jauh2.. Beraye la ktorg kt cni dgn Wan, nenek belah Abah je.. Aki, arwah atuk belah Abah yg plg rapat dgn Mira pn da xde.. Da la kg sblh je, x rase pape pn sbb mmg evryday g ctu.. Nk blk Raub, Aki, arwah atuk belah Mak pn da xde.. Huhh~ Pe la nasib.. Raye yg sgt mnyedihkn.. (T_T)

Especially 4 my dearest Nyssa!

Assalamualaikum..

Ttb teringat kt my best fren, NURANISA NORODDIN.. 4 ur info, nisa skrg tgh bjuang lpas abes operation.. Ptotnye 20hb aritu operate nye tp kne tangguh plak ke 24hb.. Sdey sgt coz b4 blk cuti ari 2, ade borak2 dgn dye jap.. Dye ckp dye tkut sbnrnye tp dye xnk tangguh2 lg operation 2.. Sbbnye dye xnk trus2an tanggung skt 2.. Lgpn cpt sgt mbesar so better operate awal2.. Mira pn rsau sgt psl dye sbb i know her well, cmane dye sbnrnye.. Da byk kali dye luahkn ktakutan dye 2, tp yg mira mampu wt hny bg smgt kt dye.. Tp rasenye she can go through all dat.. Mira sntiase doakn nisa taw.. Hope sape2 yg bc post ni pn doakn nisa..

Nisa, nisa, nisa~ Realy hope nisa kuat lalui sume ni.. Pape hal mira sntiase support nisa.. Klw Srwk 2 dkt, mmg da lame mira g temankn nisa.. Nisa chat dgn mira ari 2 ok je smpaikn mira lupe lgsg psl operation 2.. Im so sory dear.. Hope sume bjln lancar n nisa get well soon~ Mira x sbr nk jmp nisa next sem, nnt update cte dgn mira lg taw.. Nnt kte kwa jln2 lg, mira xkn tglkn nisa bile nk lintas jln da.. Hehe~ ;p Jage diri leklok.. Mmmuackxx! (n_n)

The Truth or Just Misunderstanding?

Cmane nk start eh.. Im a bit confuse.. Smuanye start dgn mistake n misrep yg later jd fraud by silence n then tjdnye breach of promise n finally caused frustration n damage.. The pain sgt2 mnyakitkn.. Tuhan je yg taw.. Hnya self defence yg bantu kuatkn hati utk went through all that.. Kesabaran n ketabahan utk mhadapi n melalui sume 2 hnya dsbbkn rase sayang.. Klw x, da lame move on n leave out all that..

But sume 2 ade limitnye jgk.. If happened b'ulang2 kali, kuat lg ke hati nk accept? If hati n prsn dlukai btubi2 n dicarik2 into pieces, ade pluang lg ke utk cantumkn blk? Pe yg nmpk wrongdoing kte je.. But is it wrong if kte sayang sum1? Is it wrong if kte jd over acting sket smata2 nk make sure bout sumtin n nk protect pe yg kte ade? Is it wrong if kte try defence diri bile org hurt kte even dye x sengaje? Bkn intention kte pn nk cr pasal, jauh skali wt criminal offence, sbb 'heart' offence xde dlm Penal Code pn..

Kte x penah minx rase sayang 2 muncul tp Allah S.W.T wujudkn rase 2 dlm hati tanpa kte sdar.. Kte ade hati, prsn n maruah jgk.. Fkr la psl others b4 making any statement.. Sbb statement 2 myb ble hurt sum1 n jd defamatory.. Mulut org kte xle duga n control, mcm2 people can say sbb kt Msia ni kn ade freedom of speech.. But.. Jgn sng2 nk lpaskn geram wlau mrh cmane pn kte n then sng2 jgk come back utk apologize.. Apology kt open court pn ade condition nye..

Hati gurl ni mdh tguris tp klw btul caranye, sng je nk sejukkn.. Klw rase xle fulfill janji, jgn la bg hrpn.. Gurl akn jd realy2 affected if sum1 guris n tglkn dye especially sum1 dat realy2 special to her time dye sgt2 perlukn sum1 utk support dye.. X sume gurls same, ade yg ske wt kptsn melulu tnpa fkr akibatnye dlu tp mrh dye 2 xkn lame.. Bile gurl tgh mrh, jgn tmbhkn lg kmrhn dye dgn ckp yg bkn2 n tengking2, cuba act with common humanity.. Api xle lwn dgn api.. Mst ade sbb knp klw gurl 2 ignore je even da try nk berbaek smule.. Myb hati dye da sgt2 hancur n need time 2 recover..

Plus.. Myb its time 4 u  2 know yg even slame ni dye sng nk maafkn n byk bg muka sbb tlalu sayang, tp jgn ske ambk ksmptn.. Sbb, dat will not last 4eva sbb ade masenye nnt dye akn letih utk mngalah.. Time 2 hati dye akn jd lg keras dr batu.. 2 la.. Sape suh jd selfish n x fkr lgsg psl prsn org?


Smntara 2, cuba fkr n renung blk cmane lynan kte kt sum1 2 slame ni.. Ntah2 mmg ptot pn sbb kte x penah reti nk hargai bile dye ade kt sisi kte.. Muhasabah diri blk, jgn asek nk blame others.. Klw da taw dye cmane, ptotnye kte cuba la sdaya upaya nk jage hati dye.. Bkn ambk ksmptn dgn abaikn dye sbb taw dye sng memaafkn.. Kononnye sbb necessity.. Ni bkn jgk act of God tp act of our heart yg mmg xtaw appreciate sumtin smpai its gone..

Mmg memafkn org 2 lg mulia dr meminta maaf tp utk kte memaafkn org yg da byk sgt sakitkn kte is not dat easy.. Tp klw btul2 ikhlas n tulus rase sayang 2, insyaAllah Tuhan akn lindungi hbgn 2 n lmbt laun hati akn lembut.. But myb not now.. So, moral of the story, jgn take things 4 granted n hargai la pe yg ade b4 its gone or it will be too late 2 regret!

Hum Tum

Arini ttb nk bceloteh psl hum tum (aku kau)..

I had met sum1 ni 13 JAN aritu..

4 me,dye ni da ckup perfect la..

Even ade some parts yg x brp nk ok..oppss!

Yela,mane ade org yg btul2 perfect kn..

Yg x ok 2 bkn la trok sgt pn sbb yg ok lg byk dr x ok nye..

Lgpn,i know well knp dye cm2..

2 pn pas knal dye better 28 FEB aritu..

Klw x,i dun even dare 2 go out with him 21 MARCH aritu dgn my frens kt KLCC..

Plus,i wont introduce him 2 my fmly klw x knal dye..

17 JULY-KLCC.. 11 AUG-OU.. 14 AUG-KLCC.. 15 AUG-JJ.. 6 SEPT-TS.. 3 OCT-BB.. 25 OCT-TS.. 7 NOV-GIANT.. 16 NOV-MINES..

Yg menariknye,everyday mst kitorg gdh..

Smpaikn klw dlm sehari x gdh rase cm kosong je..

Tp biasenye im the one yg cr pasal n cpt terase..

Sbb dye ni mmg x pndai nk jage hati org sket n susa sgt nk fhm ati gurl..

Gdh plg bsar ms 18 OCT aritu la tp nsb bek jap je n da setle sume..

Cm2 la kitorg,gdh2 then ok blk..

Tp 2 yg seronok sbnrnye..

Sbb..

Hbgn xkn happening klw asek hapy n mdatar je..

Mane ade yg happily ever after cm dlm fairy tale 2..

Lately br realize sejauh mane syg dye 4 me..

Bile msg2 da blk rmh ni,msg2 ade hal sndri..

Bile jrg contact rndu plak,sunyi je rase..

Btul la kate2 ni..

"Perpisahan 2 indah jika kte dpt berbicara bhsa rndu"..

Sayang vs Cinta

Mane satu lg bernilai?

As 4 me, sayang 2 lg jauh bernilai dr cinta..

Sbbnye..sayang dtg dlu dr cinta..

Lgpn..sayang akn bkekalan..

Xmcm cinta..

Cinta susah nk hadir tp sng nk hilang..

Skali wt salah,cinta x mjamin pape..

Tapi..

Dgn adenye sayang,kte akn trime sum1 2 seadenye dye..

Syaratnye,sayang 2 kne dtg tulus dr hati..

Bkn luahan semata2 utk jage hati..

Nnt kte akn lukakn hati org..

Tuhan 2 Maha Adil..

Skali kte sakitkn org,xyah tgu kt AKHIRAT pn Tuhan ble bls..

Ucapan cinta x penting..

Sekadar ucapkn sayang pn da ckup bmakna..

2 pn klw kata2 2 btl2 ikhlas la..

Mslhnye..

Kte slalu nk pe yg kte susah nk dpt..

Tapi bile da dpt,xreti nk hargai plak..

Bile da xde,br thegeh2 nk cr blk..

Tapi sume 2 da tlambat..

Sbb 2 la,kte kne jdkn pe yg kte da ade sbg yg tbaek..

Xde la kte mnyesal di kmudian hari..

Xgne tkejar2 bintang di langit sdgkn kte ade mawar di daratan..

Bintang 2 nmpk je cntik dr jauh,x smstinye cntik bile dkt..

Tapi..

Mawar cntik dr jauh n bile dkt lg cntik,wangi plak 2..

So..

Moral of d story,juz appreciate what u hav..

Dun try 2 hav what u luv~